Haim Ginott, fully Haim G. Ginott, orignially Ginzburg

Ginott, fully Haim G. Ginott, orignially Ginzburg

Israeli-born American Author, Clinical Psychologist, Child Therapist and Parent Educator

Author Quotes

Happiness... is not a destination: it is a manner of traveling. Happiness is not an end in itself. It is a by-product of working, playing, loving and living.

Children are like wet cement. Whatever falls on them makes an impression.

Treat a child as though he already is the person he's capable of becoming.

Teachers are expected to reach unattainable goals with inadequate tools. The miracle is that at times they accomplish this impossible task.

Praise, like penicillin must not be administered haphazardly.

A teacher, like a playwright, has an obligation to be interesting or, at least, brief. A play closes when it ceases to interest audiences.

When forced to study, children use their ingenuity to get through school without learning.

For children, learning is never without emotional overtones. Whenever a teacher ignores the emotions and resorts to logical explanations, learning limps to a halt.

Labeling is disabling.

It is easier to gain cooperation by changing moods than by changing minds.

Children are never sure of their abilities. A public attack on intelligence hits their most vulnerable spot. Virulent criticism doesn't motivate children to improve; on the contrary, it ruins their initiative.

Verbal spankings do not improve performance or personality. They only ignite hate.

A slow student is not cured by sarcasm. Mental processes are not mended by mockery. Ridicule breeds hate and invites vengeance.

When teachers are at their best they display a common orientation: they do not believe in the power of pontification. They neither preach nor moralize. They give no guilt and demand no promises... are not preoccupied with the child's past history or distant future, they deal with the present. What matters to them is the here and now of the child in distress.

A modern teacher educates children to value their emotions.

Acknowledging experience and reflecting feelings are helpful interpersonal skills. However, they are not tricks or gimmicks. Nor can they be used mechanically. They are helpful only within a context of concern and respect. In human relations the agents of help are never solely the techniques, but the person who employs them. Without compassion and authenticity, the techniques fail.

Reason and logic do not satisfy our emotional needs.

If you try to convince your child that he knows nothing, in other words, that he is stupid, the real danger is that he may believe you.

Differentiate between acceptance and approval.

Don't invite dependence. Don't hurry to correct facts. Don't violate his privacy. Avoid clichés and preaching. Don't talk in chapters. Don't label him. Don't use reverse psychology. Don't send contradictory messages. Don't futurize.

First, of all do not deny your teenager's perception. Do not argue with his experience. Do not disown his feelings. Specifically, do not try to convince him that what he sees or hears or feels or senses is not so.

Concerned adults serve best when with confidence they stand and wait.

Rebellion follows rejection.

Parents often talk about the younger generation as if they didn't have anything to do with it.

Misbehavior and punishment are not opposites that cancel each other - on the contrary they breed and reinforce each other.

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Ginott, fully Haim G. Ginott, orignially Ginzburg
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Israeli-born American Author, Clinical Psychologist, Child Therapist and Parent Educator